MY NAME IS EARL [1]

I had always been fascinated by the concept of karma and justice. Therefore, I fell in love with this sitcom since the first time I watched it as the serial revolves around the concept of ‘karma’. For those who never watch this serial, the sitcom tells a story about Earl J Hickie, a crook with occasional run-ins with the law, who is trying to made as many good deeds as possible to payback all the bad things he had done in the past. For some, the serial may be boring as it always has similar story line, Earl finds a new way to pay bad karma and finish it at the end of the show, but for me, I like every piece of it as it’s kind of act as a reminder for me about the karma itself. [2]

Dengarkanlah matahariku, suara tangisanku
Kubersedih karna panah cinta menusuk jantungku
Ucapkan matahariku puisi tentang hidupku
Tentangku yang tak mampu menaklukkan waktu

One told me before that she was afraid of all the bad deeds she had done in the past. The karma may haunt her for the rest of her life. I, once, had the same thought as well. But then, we never know exactly how karma works. It’s just a black box whom only God knows how it works. We know the inputs, we know the outputs but we never know how God calculate it for us. I did many bad things in my life. Terrible. I hurt lots of people with my words and actions. But, it does not stop me embracing tomorrow. Who wants to embrace tomorrow if we all know things come in our way tomorrow only gonna hurt us?

Berjuta warna pelangi di dalam hati
Sejenak luluh bergeming menjauh pergi
Tak ada lagi cahaya suci
Semua nada beranjak aku terdiam sepi
[Matahariku, Agnes Monica]

Nonetheless, this does not mean I should give a damn care about my mistakes. I believe in every religion we are taught God is forgiving. So if we sincerely ask for forgiveness, one should get it. But again, it was not there to be taken for granted [2]. Apologize, to God and to the person you’ve hurt. Sincerely. Do whatever you can do to fix that mistakes (this is what Earl is doing). Finally, move forward by not repeating the same mistakes.

I still believe in Karma. But I am not afraid of it. The older we are, the more responsible we should be. The more we should accept the consequences of our acts. And the more we should appreciate those who did not pinned down their revenges on our bad deeds. For the bad deeds in the past, I can only fix it whenever possible. Sometime, it is not feasible to do that. Then, I just do the good deeds to someone I know, hoping that the kindness will be paid forward. So at the very least, I helped to create some equilibrium to the world by bringing some good karmas. Maybe that makes God to calculate the karma to my favour.

-I will not play a hero as I know the world does not revolve around me. I just wish I can be a hero for my special someone. Someone who can prove she is worthy enough for all my fights and sacrifices.-

Catlio
2 Gul Circle

[1] My Name is Earl is a title of sitcom aired by NBC not my real name.
[2] The show also received a lot of criticism as it was claimed having a Scientologist basis. I do not give a damn care. I guess every religion taught us, what goes around comes around.
[3] God is much more forgiving than a human. If God forgiveness is not supposed to be taken for granted, so do human’s. It takes much more for someone to forgive our mistakes. So appreciate them who forgive you.